I thoroughly enjoy the ease with which you skewer aspects of modern metropolitan life and am intrigued as to what will develop between these 2 characters. You have a very good ear for dialogue but I wonder whether, at this early stage, this could be pared down a bit so that momentum isn't lost. Having said that, when's the next instalment?
The story flows smoothly and is really well paced; would love to learn soon what is going to happen next. I would perhaps slightly condense the description of the kitchen (however well
I thoroughly enjoy the ease with which you skewer aspects of modern metropolitan life and am intrigued as to what will develop between these 2 characters. You have a very good ear for dialogue but I wonder whether, at this early stage, this could be pared down a bit so that momentum isn't lost. Having said that, when's the next instalment?
ReplyDeleteI almost thought I was in my own kitchen!
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteThe story flows smoothly and is really well paced; would love to learn soon what is going to happen next. I would perhaps slightly condense the description of the kitchen (however well
ReplyDelete...written it is) to mantain the momentum.